From Quiet Participant to Teen Ambassador: Kealey’s Valerie’s House Journey

When Kealey first walked through the doors of Valerie’s House, she wasn’t interested in talking about her grief.

Her mom died when she was eight years old. A year later, after hearing about Valerie’s House through a friend or on Facebook, her family decided to give it a try.

“I was very not open to the idea of talking about her or my feelings or coming to Valerie’s house,” Kealey said. “But I tried it out with my sister, and we stuck around. I stuck around because of the sweets, but now I’m here, so it works.”

Today, nearly 10 years later, Kealey is one of Valerie’s House’s Teen Ambassadors, helping younger kids who are facing losses similar to her own.

Learning How to Grieve

The months after her mother’s death were difficult. For a long time, Kealey kept her emotions to herself.

“Even after I started coming to Valerie’s house, like, I was one of the quietest kids at Valerie’s house, and it took me a while to open up on my feelings,” she said.

What eventually helped was listening to other kids share their stories.

“Hearing their experience and making me realize that I was actually going through the same thing without even me realizing it until then,” she said. “It was very powerful for me because I realized that I had so much more feelings inside than just sadness or anger.”

One moment in particular changed her perspective.

“I remember one of the girls sharing that she, I guess, was glad that her person had passed away because they weren’t gonna be in pain anymore,” Kealey said.

Her mother had struggled with medical conditions, and hearing another child express that feeling helped her understand her own.

“It made me kind of feel validated that I wasn’t bad for thinking that she’s not here anymore,” she said. “It made me feel like I had people who understood me.”

A Second Home

Over time, Valerie’s House became more than a place where Kealey attended groups.

“I like to think of Valerie’s house as my second home,” she said.

The relationships she built there have stayed with her as she grew up.

“People that have been there since I was younger, I’ve had them up until now that I’m 19, so it’s like, those are lifelong friendships right there that I wouldn’t ever want to give up.”

Giving Back

Kealey’s path to becoming a Teen Ambassador started when her sister brought her back to Valerie’s House to volunteer.

“I saw that people needed help,” she said. “Especially in the kitchen. So I just started to help around.”

Before long, she realized she wanted to support other kids the same way people had supported her.

“Hearing younger kids than me going through the same thing that I went through, I was able to give them advice that I received and that I wish I could have received at that time,” she said.

Today, she’s become someone younger participants can trust.

“It feels, in a way, rewarding knowing that people can trust you with those feelings that they don’t trust everyone with,” Kealey said.

Looking Ahead

Kealey plans to attend Florida Gulf Coast University and pursue both her bachelor’s and master’s degrees in social work. Before that, she hopes to spend some time working as a flight attendant.

No matter where life takes her, she says Valerie’s House will always remain part of her story.

“I am going to be leaving Valerie’s house for a little bit, but I am going to return because this is my 2nd home.”

For Kealey, the place that once helped her find her voice has become the place where she now helps others find theirs.